Quite Honestly: Rejuvenation

I used to workout every other day, and it became something I actually looked forward to after a long day of work. I then got caught up in Honduras, and my future and everything else going on and that healthy habit slowly disappeared from my life. Lately, I have been finding myself wanting to go for a run or bike ride more and more. Unfortunately, because of being in Honduras, I can’t really do that. I have had to find creative ways to get a workout in without and videos or equipment. I love the way that a quick 15 minute workout can help to shed the stress laying on my day and rejuvenate my spirit.

As I was working out today, and was feeling the stress leave me body as I did jumping jacks, my mind began to think about the idea of rejuvenation. What does it mean to be rejuvenated? Mirriam-Webster dictionary defines it in several ways, but my favorite was “to make young or youthful again : give new vigor to”. It is my favorite because that’s what it really feels like. When I finish a workout, I feel revived; I feel like I’m ready to tackle any difficult tasks I’ve been putting off.

Of course, that led me to thinking about spiritual rejuvenation.

Every morning, the first thing I do is read a devotional. I do this before talking to anyone, before pulling out my computer or reading any other book. It is my way of connecting with God and starting my day off right. This is a habit I have wanted to form for many years, and I’m so glad I can finally claim that. Not only does a morning start with many promises, but when the first thing you read are the promises of God, it’s like everything is right in your life (even if just for a moment). It’s that same rejuvenation of the spirit!

As I posted about a couple weeks ago, and have been continuing to touch on in my posts, I am relearning the basics of my faith. God is doing a lot work in my heart and I have come to understand something.

It has been and is a rejuvenation of my spiritual life.

God is making me “young again” and I’m getting “new vigor to” my walk with Him. The passions that kept my fire aglow in high school are returning to me as I seek Him. The many thoughts and habits that kept me on track throughout the day are slowly returning as part of my life. To say it has been a challenge would be an understatement.

I’m constantly having to check myself and assess my life. I have to look at the habits I have versus the habits I want and figure out what I need to do to attain them. I am constantly in need of God’s grace as I mess up and readjust my life. I am also learning to give myself a lot of grace in this walk. I have always been really hard on myself, and gotten disappointed in myself easily. I’m learning how to praise and reward myself for moving forward and to learn from the times I don’t without getting discouraged.

Life is a delicate balance of give and take. I’m still learning those balances and am just beginning to grasp the idea of balance as a whole.

The one thing I can say with full confidence, is that this has been the most rewarding thing I have done in my life.

There are always going to be things that need improvement, or to be eliminated completely, but it is so important to rejoice over the accomplishments and the transformation!

What are some things you can do to rejuvenate your spiritual life? Maybe you’re in a place that you’ve grown so distant from Christ, you’re not sure how to find your way back:

Start by praying, start by singing, start by praising, start by being honest with yourself. It’s a difficult process, but the most challenging step is the first one. God has not left you in the deep-end, to watch you suffer and drown; He has been holding out his hand to you all this time so that you may be held in His perfect grace.

Maybe you’re at the height of your spiritual walk, and have never felt so close to God:

Find a new habit you can include in your life or new activity that rejuvenates your spirit. May it be starting a journal, a vlog, or going on a prayer walk. There are so many opportunities for us to step out of this world and into Christ and spend time being rejuvenated!

Have a blessed day!

-Sadie

 

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Quite Honestly: When Things Go Wrong

{Disclaimer: I sincerely apologize if this comes across as a way for me to vent, that is definitely not my intention. I have began writing these “Quite Honestly” posts to share where I am at spiritually. I’m learning to be quite honest about the things I am working through and the emotions I’m feeling in an attempt to inspire others.}

I have been having several days in a row where things seem to be working against me. It’s as though every thing that could go wrong, does.

Yesterday, among many other frustrations, I had an allergic reaction to an ant bite. I have been bit plenty of times (every day) on my feet by these ants while being here, yet for some reason my body reacted differently. Almost instantly my foot become extremely swollen and painful. Before long it was mostly numb and difficult to walk on.

Today, I’m dealing with the swelling and pain from that, and also beginning to get a sore throat and migraine. I just fought off a sinus cold over the weekend, and I’m dreading having to do this all over again. As some of you may know, I have an extremely weak immune system. I take several vitamins every day to keep from constantly being sick. When I do get sick, I double up on vitamins and drink a ton of fluids, but regardless it takes a toll on my body. All of my energy goes into fighting off whatever illness has found me, therefore I become extremely tired. I hate being sick and having bodily issues all the time. I hate that I have low pain tolerance and when talking about these things come across as though I’m complaining.

I’ve been working on school stuff, trying to get a graduation plan finished. As I’m working on this, I get an e-mail from my admissions advisor, reminding me that I can’t take any more education courses until my background check is finished. I ordered said background check in March, and followed all the required steps, but my payment was never processed. I emailed my advisor, and her attempt to help fell flat and I have gotten nowhere. It is now August, and I have had to do the detailed, mundane process again, in hopes that things have changed and my payment will be processed. Right now, it’s okay that I can’t take education courses, because I have other courses I can take. Yet, it’s extremely frustrating, because that leaves me to having several semesters in a row of only education courses.

These are just a few of the bigger things affecting my life right now; the tip of the iceberg, as some would say.

I haven’t been able to sleep well, I’ve been having a lot of headaches and migraines, my stomach hasn’t been accepting very many foods lately, my neighbor enjoys playing music with really loud bass at night which gives me a headache, my knee that I injured last month has been aching, and the list goes on.

Needless to say, life has been a little frustrating lately. I feel like I’ve been running in circles. Like I’m working hard to accomplish things, yet nothing is actually being accomplished.

God has blessed me with a very patient spirit. I have always been patient when things aren’t working as I hoped they might, or as they should. I have always been patient with people who aren’t able to or willing to get things done when or how they should be done. Things that many people get frustrated or irritated about, tend to go right over my head.

And yet, my patience is beginning to wear thin. I’m beginning to get frustrated about a few things. I also had become a little discouraged by it all. Almost feeling abandoned, in a way. So I began to evaluate the situation and how I was feeling and realized that all of the above things mentioned, are completely out of my control.

I can’t change that my body had an allergic reaction, or that that one ant bit me. I can’t fix my immune system and stop getting sick. I can’t change my pain tolerance. I can’t make this payment become processed and for all those details to work out.

It’s not even about being in control for me, it’s that I can’t fix it. I’m a fixer. I like to fix problems, give advice to those whom ask for it, and work to improve anything that can be improved. And yet, i can’t fix any of it. There is nothing I can do to change what is happening.

The two things I can do about all of this are to pray, and to cling to Christ. In all my frustrations, stress and disappointment, God remains. He knows all that is on my heart and mind. I’m learning to go to Him and just to talk. Let out my frustrations and triumphs of the day.

It’s certainly not easy. I forget to do so more often than I remember. But, I’m finding that each time I walk towards Him, and hand him my thoughts and emotions, He returns them back with peace and strength. Those two things do not make the problems go away, or lessen the affect they have on my life, but they do help me to feel more prepared to handle them and anything else that may come.

Have a blessed day!

-Sadie